Volume 3 #14 July 28, 2003 This is a tale of two statuettes. One is a gray, very alive looking cat that my brother gave me for a birthday gift a few years ago. She weighs about thirty pounds or so. Seems to me she got heavier every time that I had to lift under her in order to dust. Then, about a year later, I was gifted with a mouse statuette who proudly stands grasping a chunk of cheese. I named the cat Persia and the mouse Chuckie Cheese. They took their appointed places on the top rung of our wooden room divider. I faithfully polished them three times a week. Persia's blue eyes glistened. Chuckie Cheese's very large front teeth sparkled. One day, after much introspection, I said to my little guy: "Dude, ya' know they're really cute but I'm getting a bit tired of hoisting and dusting these two." Ow! I felt the guilt trip comin' down. Our abode affords us a barbecue area. I guess you know what it looks like. A cement picnic table trying to pass itself off as marble. I said to my little guy: "Gosh! This cat is beginning to outweigh me. Have you been feeding her?" Of course, he looked at me with "roadkill eyes" and denied it. But I did notice a tell-tale trail of gravel droppings leading directly to Persia's perch. I don't know with what he stuffed Chuckie Cheese 'cause the only cheese we have in our fridge is that healthy stuff. I think it contains one percent mystery cheese and ninety nine percent water. I really hope it is water. It's the kind that no matter how many slices you pile on top of whatever veggies you're cooking the "cheese' melts and melts and melts till it becomes invisible. So, my man couldn't have been tempting Chuckie with that. Maybe, my little dude was feeding him the real thing just to freak me out! Nah! He would never do that. I think clever Chuckie was making midnight cheese runs to the local deli. Anyway, the ongoing evolution to this tale is that one day my little guy said, "Let's put the cat on the picnic table. I was dubious. Several bricks have disappeared from our patio and have been used as weapons of windshield destruction. So, I was a bit trepedicious about abandoning Persia there. The oddest thing started happening. A person or persons began rotating her from side to side... back to front... or maybe she was doing it on her own. This continued for about three weeks. Then we introduced Chuckie Cheese to this little "Pet Play". He began to turn up in all sorts of places and positions. Across from Persia... next to her... nose to nose... sitting on top of her neck. You name it. They had the moves. What we couldn't reckon through was who exactly was orchestrating these movements. We thought of staking out the place. My guy has a pair of binoculars. But his eyelids soon began to droop from the strain. Then we strategized a new theory. Spy cameras. We could catch them in the Cat and Mouse Feng Shui act! We reconsidered. Let them have their fun! It brings joy to us and to them. So, let them eat cake... er... kibble and cheese.
We have now added Mokie the Christmas bear. Santa hat and all. We obtained him in some interaction with a food catalogue. A new game is afoot or apaw! I dunno. This is what I do know. This complex hosts someone playfully creative. Well as Eastwood would say: "It really makes my day!"