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Volume 1 #10 September 6, 1999
I am trying to reason through a peculiar subject: Date Movies! Hollywood churns them out faster than butter. I read reviews of these films and the writers will inevitably tag it a: "Great Date Movie!" I don't think that they are talking about one of those road side stands that advertise "Date Shakes" while your father is speeding through Indio, California. You really want to experience this enticement! He always says: "Next time we'll stop." But there's never a next time. Has anyone ever tasted a date shake? Probably not. Unless your mother was driving. That, in my family was a No Chance! How did I get blown over by a palm tree? Date Movies, that was originally it. I'm not saying they are particularly bad. But consider the titles: Sleepless... Clueless... they speak yawningly and dumbly for themselves. These critics are trying to steer desperate men into dragging the current objects of their affection to fall into this ticky-tacky box number. The appointed high and mighty advisors figure the men are going "score" if they take the victim or volunteer of their choice to one of these soggy, several handkerchief celluloids. Are the critics on the take or claim to be clairvoyant? It surprises me that they don't have their own late night infomercials. Do the daters send questionnaires to the datees concerning their preferences? It is a genre that I don't embrace. I want a mind challenging experience. I do not enjoy things that are tied up in neat little "Pink Ribbons". My favourite film is "Death In Venice". Reason: I am an imperfect person who is hooked on the idea of suffering for perfection. To better understand this, watch the film! I can't tell you how many times my significant other (Bless him!) has pretended to stay awake and enjoy watching it with me. Even with subtitles. That reads "True Love".

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©1999 Carol Ann Carson
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